3 a.m. Monsters That Are Out To Get You

I work nights and so that goes without saying that I sleep during the day. This has been my lifestyle for almost a decade now. It’s been so long that I am now an honorary vampire though I still haven’t quite warmed up to Edward and Bella since they moved to our neighborhood a few years ago.

On weekends when everybody is fast asleep, I am painfully wide awake. This is on the assumption that I am not out with friends, which actually happen albeit rather sporadically. It has been said that I am gonna inherit the “no social life” crown from Anne Frank. Until now, the executors of her estate have not contacted me so I can breathe easy and be content with my title as the poster child for “practically close to having no social life”.

Please don’t take my ramblings as a complaint for staying at home because I do love staying at home. I just hate it when I’m awake at 3 a.m on a Sunday and is bored to tears with only my tablet to comfort me. And I hate it because of the things I usually end up doing:

1. Eat a lot of junk food.

2. Waste too much time on Facebook.

3. Retweet a lot of jokes.

4. Download apps that usually get deleted on Monday when mind clears.

5. Raid fridge and cupboards amidst complaints of my fat ass.

6. Drink lots of water then pee a lot.

7. Berate self for being single too long.

8. Daydream not being single.

9. Shame self on being shallow and plan to be a better person i.e., volunteer in the community, blog for social causes, work out, go back to school, etc.

10. FB some more and add ex who has initially unfriended me after a breakup gone bad.

11. Undo friend request to said ex.

12. Pray to all the still awake saints who guard Facebook not to send an email notification to ex about friend request.

13. Pray to patron saints of lame ex-girlfriends to plan an accidental meeting/reunion with ex when I’m 30 pounds lighter and preferably engaged or at least with a bald hunk of a boyfriend.

14. Eat heavy breakfast because I survived the night.

source: dumpaday.com

source: dumpaday.com

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8 thoughts on “3 a.m. Monsters That Are Out To Get You

  1. would like to raid the fridge if there was one. i remember the days when we didnt had a fridge and we must eat everything that might spoil the next day. 🙂

    Like

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