The Things I Want To Tell Other Women

1. Please stop slut shaming. Whenever a woman becomes a third party, she should get equal blame as the man she got involved with. Most of the time though, it is easier to blame the woman, which is just further proof of machismo.

2. If you are now with a guy whom you stole from another woman, the odds that he will get involved with another woman while he is with you is high. Everything that goes around, comes around.

3. Please do not judge me for forever wearing jeans and sneakers. They are comfortable and not against the law. If you do, then I’ll stop passing judgment on your stripper heels and how you look funny in that skirt.

4. Your mom would always be one of the best persons you will ever get to know. Tell her that.

5. Embrace sexuality. It is a gift. No one should make you feel ashamed of it, not the society, especially, not the church.

6. Most of us grew up in a culture where we are supposed to find men we’ll spend the rest of our days with. Some of us will do just that. Some will end up with more than just one. There will also be those who would end up with another woman. And others will decide to live alone and pursue other things. We have to respect everyone’s path. No shame in not wanting a family or children. Most of these people are mature enough to decide they’re not fit to be parents or that they’d rather do something else.

7. Try not to compare yourself too much to other women. It is hard but you can try. Each of us has a story not other people know about. If you always compare yourself to other people, then someone will always be more beautiful, smarter, bitchier, nicer, less smart, less educated and so on and so forth.

8. Stop berating yourself. Being a woman is hard enough. You have your period every month, have to deal with PMS, have to endure high heels, get squeezed in the train during rush hour, get leered at by drunks. Be kinder to yourself. You deserve it more than you think you do.

9. As they say, you can always use a man for misery. But really, most women would agree that nothing feels better than being with a man (or a woman) who loves and respects you. That is true. But being without a partner shouldn’t make you feel less about yourself. Truth is it’s just harder nowadays to find a mate. What with a lot of them turning gay and most of us getting stuck at work. But the universe works in an awesome way to balance things. So while waiting for that guy (or girl), just chill and stop thinking that there is something seriously wrong with you.

10. You are beautiful, not because of that makeup or that dress but because you are yourself. You are smart and should not be afraid of your own thoughts. You have a voice that should not be silenced. You are a good person with a kind heart. You are sexy and not afraid of what other people think of you. You are fair and do not go around casting judgement on people. Even if you are single, you are not alone because you have a family that truly cares for you and friends who are great people who make you laugh. You are a great person because you are a woman.

Photo courtesy of

Photo courtesy of

3 a.m. Monsters That Are Out To Get You

I work nights and so that goes without saying that I sleep during the day. This has been my lifestyle for almost a decade now. It’s been so long that I am now an honorary vampire though I still haven’t quite warmed up to Edward and Bella since they moved to our neighborhood a few years ago.

On weekends when everybody is fast asleep, I am painfully wide awake. This is on the assumption that I am not out with friends, which actually happen albeit rather sporadically. It has been said that I am gonna inherit the “no social life” crown from Anne Frank. Until now, the executors of her estate have not contacted me so I can breathe easy and be content with my title as the poster child for “practically close to having no social life”.

Please don’t take my ramblings as a complaint for staying at home because I do love staying at home. I just hate it when I’m awake at 3 a.m on a Sunday and is bored to tears with only my tablet to comfort me. And I hate it because of the things I usually end up doing:

1. Eat a lot of junk food.

2. Waste too much time on Facebook.

3. Retweet a lot of jokes.

4. Download apps that usually get deleted on Monday when mind clears.

5. Raid fridge and cupboards amidst complaints of my fat ass.

6. Drink lots of water then pee a lot.

7. Berate self for being single too long.

8. Daydream not being single.

9. Shame self on being shallow and plan to be a better person i.e., volunteer in the community, blog for social causes, work out, go back to school, etc.

10. FB some more and add ex who has initially unfriended me after a breakup gone bad.

11. Undo friend request to said ex.

12. Pray to all the still awake saints who guard Facebook not to send an email notification to ex about friend request.

13. Pray to patron saints of lame ex-girlfriends to plan an accidental meeting/reunion with ex when I’m 30 pounds lighter and preferably engaged or at least with a bald hunk of a boyfriend.

14. Eat heavy breakfast because I survived the night.



Happy Valentine’s Y’all

VDAY chart

Today is one of the most celebrated days in the whole Hallmarkdom. Seriously, practically everything has been written about today. So I just want to reach out to the single people out there to not feel too alone. Today could really get too harsh if you’re too concerned about your relationship status. Or the lack of it. I’m not going to elaborate on how your family and your friends love you because you know that already. Or maybe not. If so, this is an auspicious day for you to reflect on that. And for the couples out there, well, other than the cliche, “celebrate your love,” I have got nothing else but a tiny request, please don’t shove it in our throats. We get it, okay?

Happy Valentine’s.
May this day turn out better than you expect it to be.



Apologies, Mate

I’m sorry I haven’t blogged since forever. I don’t even have a decent excuse for it. But this time I intend to keep my promise to write regularly. It’s not like I have a boyfriend to keep me preoccupied anyway. Not that I’m saying I’ll ditch you if and when I get a boyfriend. Geez, mate!